Violent Ink

Snail-tastic

Apparently things go slowly when you aren't an acute case, and even more slowly when it's the weekend. We were under the impression that the boy was going to get his upper GI test today, but it got scheduled for Tuesday. He is also scheduled for a swallow study on Monday. It sounds like the main reason we are in the hospital is because of the concern over the kidlet's oxygen levels, but the news on that front is good: He's been off oxygen for most of the day, except for during one nap when it dropped a little. His levels stayed high during a later nap, though, and he is sleeping now, and they are still good.

To test whether he is having reflux issues, they are doing this very complicated thing. He wasn't allowed to eat for 24 hours (though we weren't told how that affected his respiratory rate or oxygen levels). Then he has had a feeding tube down to his intestine until a little while ago. (He is fully capable of eating on his own; they are just checking how his rates react to not having any reflux whatsoever.) A bit ago, his tube was moved up some, where it will remain for 24 hours. If his levels stay good/improve more, they will move it to his stomach and see if he has reflux and how that affects his levels. (Edited to add: Just kidding! Apparently they just moved it to his stomach, which I'm pretty sure is not what we were told was happening, but that's OK. Hopefully they moved to the next step because his levels were so good.)

So far, all his tests have been normal, and his numbers are good, but we don't have an answer yet, so the waiting continues. And still, the little guy remains in (relative) good spirits and a little charmer to everyone he meets.

Thanks to everyone for all your thoughts, prayers, emails, notes and Facebook comments. I cannot express how loved and supported we feel right now and how much we appreciate that.

It's been a little crazy ...

So I went back to work and Isaac started daycare for real, and I thought the biggest drama was going to be that he had a five-day fever (low-grade) his first week and a stomach virus that was going around the center last weekend. We were really hoping for a calm weekend this weekend.

I just posted this on Facebook:

Just wanted to let people know that Isaac is at Hopkins undergoing some tests. He's breathed a little rapidly/shallowly pretty much forever, and we thought that was just normal baby behavior, since he's been healthy, growing, thriving and happy. Enough people made comments about his breathing offhandedly that I mentioned it at his 6-month checkup. His ped took a closer look and decided we should see a specialist just to be sure. We went to the specialist (pediatric pulmonologist) Thursday, and the doctors there saw something they didn't like (very slight drop in his oxygen levels when he was eating) and decided to use some pull to get Isaac into Hopkins right then.

So here we are. So far we don't have any answers, and things are moving at a snail's pace. Good news is, we clearly aren't being treated as an acute or emergent case. The bad news is, everything is taking forever -- he had two tests in the afternoon yesterday, and the day staff left without giving us the results. We're going to try to pin down the doctor today about what exactly they think might be happening and how long they think this whole testing process is going to take. Every time we see someone new, they ask, "Why are you here?" and as far as we know, the answer is still "because he breathes a little fast." But the other good news is, due to proxmity alone, we're in one of the best hospitals in the world, so there is some comfort in that.

Poor Isaac is handling everything like a champ, being way more patient than I would be with all the tubes and the poking and prodding.

Only one of us can stay overnight, and we're taking turns, so the cats are doing OK, and the basics at home are handled. (Thank you to those who have volunteered to check in on the kitties!)

We really appreciate your thoughts and prayers, and we will keep you posted.

Since I wrote that, the doctors came by and talked to Judah. (I wasn't here yet, unfortunately.) They explained a lot more about what they think might be happening and why they are doing certain things. The main possibilities being investigated are reflux or slight aspiration of food. Cardiac issues have been ruled out after a clear EKG and echocardiogram. He's had a CT scan and will have an upper GI today. We are feeling better now that we know a little more about what the possibilities could be and what the plan is, but the snail's pace still kinda stinks -- we will definitely be here through Monday, possibly longer.  But it feels more like we are headed in the right direction. Yesterday, we had no rudder, no information, no context. So we are getting there.

Back to the real world

It's been amazing (and I've been lucky), having these past few months off to spend with my Isaac. But tomorrow, it's back to the grind, back to work. I feel like I'm OK with that in a lot of ways -- Isaac has loved his transition into daycare, and I'm looking forward to seeing my friends and using my brain a little more. I honestly don't feel that stressed about it.

Or so I thought.

But the past two nights I have had these insane stress dreams. Last night's, I somehow conflated the Wii Balance Board and the motion detector that goes with Isaac's baby monitor into one thing in my head, and I woke up convinced that we were supposed to have set some button or started some program or something an hour after he went to bed. I literally jumped out of  bed and ran into his room, and once I was there, I was so confused. And the night before I dreamed that he was in bed with us and had turned around and crawled right off the bed. So I woke up, and he wasn't in bed with us, and I freaked out. He was in the crib. To me these freakouts seemed very disruptive, but Judah doesn't remember them at all.

So in the a.m.: doctor's appointment for the little guy, then he goes to daycare, then I go to the office.

I've tried to prepare as much as possible. The house is relatively clean, the laundry is all done and put away, our outfits are chosen and laid out, family pictures for my desk and the daycare bulletin board are chosen and in my purse. Just gotta get up, feed him, bathe me, get us both dressed, make a bunch of bottles and get out the door.

Now I just need to go upstairs and see if I remember how to set the alarm clock.

It's official

He's cutting a tooth. There is a little red spot on his gums on the left-hand side on the bottom front. Poor little guy.

Happy New Year!

In the jumper
Originally uploaded by kicksie.

I really cannot believe that it is 2009, but here we are!

I have thought about making some resolutions, but we are going through so many changes right now that it seems like a bad idea to put extra pressure on myself. I go back to work on Monday, and we're in the midst of transitioning Isaac into daycare. Plus, we're sleep training, and he just started crawling, so we need to baby-proof. Oh, and I believe I finally, after witnessing two and a half months of drooling, felt a bit of a tooth today.

Still, some things I would like to do:

-- Blog here more, since this is kind of functioning as my baby book for Isaac.

-- Participate in Project 365 on Flickr, wherein you take at least one picture every day, to keep my creative eye working and continue to build on what I have learned about photography during my leave.

-- Think about moderation in all things, but particularly soda. And a moderate amount of exercise (instead of none) would be good, too.

So yes, you read that right. Isaac has begun to crawl. He was on the verge of it when we were in Texas, and he had crawled a "step" or two here and there over the weekend. But after a day at daycare watching a couple of older kids, he's got it down.

And daycare is going OK so far. It's been a weird week to make the transition because a lot of kids are off for the holidays, so the infant classes have been condensed. But he has spent some time with his main teacher, and she is fabulous.

Only three more days, and then I am back at the office. Joy? I think it will be OK. I am not worried about Isaac -- he loooooves being around other kids (though I am not psyched about him being around their germs -- I am sick for the first time since last January, and I was only there for two hours). But it will great to catch up with everyone (at least, everyone who is still there) and have grown-up conversations and use my brain and stuff.